Balthazar Bench

I sat on one of the benches outside of Balthazar today watching packs of tourists and a few locals scurry by in the chillly spring air. Soho on a Saturday isn't usually my thing--too busy, too mobbed, too touristy--but after hitting the gym, I stopped for a coffee at B's takeaway alcove, adjacent to the restaurant.

I took my coffee out to one of the benches and watched the parade of people. I also caught snatches of their conversations. Here's what I heard:

"We don't have seasons in New York anymore. We just have one season."
(young woman on a cell phone to her friend)

"As many times as I call Alex...they don't even thinkg about me man."
(guy to a group of friends)

"Michael, Michael, Michael."
(woman running out of Balthazar, down the sidewalk, looking to catch up to her husband or boyfriend)

"It's cold today. It hasn't been so cold, but today it's back to the boots and socks."
(a British woman talking to her British friends, tourists)

"Oh, this looks good."
(a middle-aged female tourist, as she peered into Balthazar)

"I got your message from last night this morning."
(young woman on a cell phone)

"This is the takeaway."
(a British male tourist pointing out B's takeaway section)

"I know th right call right now is just to take it easy."
(a guy to two guy friends)

"Ooh, I like this place."
(a young woman pointing to Balthazar as she walked with her friend)

"Okay, bye-bye"
(a young guy on his cell)

"He's a very senior person in property law who I called with the possibility of discussing..."
(young Indian woman talking on her cell, voice trailing off as she walked by)

"I'm not sure there's anywhere to sit there."
(British guy to British girl, pointing to the takeaway shop)

Cell Street

Is it me, or are there more and more people skittering down New York City sidewalks talking to themselves?

They stare straight ahead or down at the ground, or sometimes a little off to the side and they appear to be talking to themselves. This isn't actually the case though. Upon closer inspection, these creatures typically have a silvery, high-tech earpiece growing out of their ear or they are pulling a small black wire tautly to their mouth in an effort to talk into a mini microphone. Their one-sided conversation is typically held at full volume. No different than folks clutching regular wireless handsets, yet they annoy me so--talking like kings of the hill and taking up precious little sidewalk space in some busy corridors. They appear not to care whether people overhear them.

"Yeah, Michael said we should meet at 8 for drinks at Sarah's house and then head over to EU for 9:30. Okay?"

"No, I said you couldn't do that! Come home immediately after school. Did you pick up the uniform? No...I said did you pick up your uniform?"

"Well did he call you after Saturday? Did he say he wanted to see you again? Well, forget it then."

Full-on sobbing: "Yes, I did...I told you that's what I wanted. No, I did and you didn't care. You didn't care."

Why do I need to hear these one-way conversations? The slick earpieces and the tiny voice microphones seem to annoy me slightly more than hearing the full-on one-sided conversations of people shouting into regular handsets. Maybe it's the sense of self-confident entitlement that gets to me....

In any case, eavesdropping is a high art in the era of wireless phones. Don't you agree?